Until we reach a certain point in our recovery journey where our partners have healed enough or we have healed enough or we have healed enough or both, it can feel like your partner is constantly triggering you.
Bouncing from trigger to trigger in your relationship is not only exhausting but robs you of a chance to experience enduring intimacy through vulnerability and authenticity.
While this kind of relational healing is an epic journey through space and place, here are some lessons you can learn today that might just be the fuel necessary to make it in the long haul together.
Lesson 1 – identify observational indicators through which your partner’s trauma has been triggered.
Lesson 2 – become versed with your emotional needs and your partners. Eventually, you want to be able to coach yourself through a trauma trigger. As a partner, you can support by saying
” I see your suffering and I am not going to ignore it”
“I stay you with you until you feel safe enough to tell me”
Lesson 3 – develop skills to set gentle accountability from a place of care and compassion.
Lesson 4 – be active in their treatment, show up for them and constantly remind them that they are not alone in this.
It can Absolutely feel hopeless when your partner is constantly triggering you. But until you both get to a basic level of competency with coaching each other through triggering situations you don’t know what is possible in terms of relational healing.