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What Is Self-Sabotage

January 24,2022 By: Mansi poddar

“Why do I keep doing this?”

“How does this keep happening to me?”

You might ask yourself these questions when you feel trapped in patterns that create problems in your life and keep you from achieving your goals.
Self-sabotage occurs when we destroy ourselves physically, mentally, or emotionally or deliberately hinder our success and wellbeing by undermining personal goals and values (Brenner, 2019).

Self-sabotage happens when you do certain things that were adaptive in one context but are no longer necessary. In other words, these behaviors helped you adapt to a previous situation, like a traumatic childhood or toxic relationship, and survive the challenges you faced there. They may have soothed you or defended you. But these methods of coping can cause difficulties when your situation changes.

What does it look like?

  • Blaming others when things go wrong.
  • Choosing to walk away when things don’t go the way you wanted.
  • Procrastination
  • Always ready to argue, even over things that don’t really matter.
  • Getting involved with people who aren’t right for you.
  • criticize yourself in front of others or have a habit of negative self-talk.